Thursday, March 17, 2011

too many roles

Sometimes I'm not sure how to divide my time. 
I feel pulled in too many directions.
I'm asked to be a full-time student.
I'm expected to be a skilled and experienced researcher.
I'm told I'm a leader.
I need to be a hard-worker.
I want to be a great wife.
I wish I was a creative cook.
And when it comes down to it, I feel overwhelmed.

Yep, these are all the things that have been swimming through my head lately.
So yesterday I finally did something about it. 
I talked with one of my professors and decided to stop working on one of the research groups that I was involved in.  And let me tell you, with one less responsibility I'm feeling much better.  
Yes, I'm still working part-time in one research group, volunteering in a second research group, and leading a third research group.  All while being a full-time student and wife.
BUT, I feel a whole lot better today than I did two days ago.
Only three more weeks and then I have a lovely 10 day break from school.
Ahhh I can taste the end.  It's so close!
For now though, at least I feel like I can breathe again.
And that, is enough to get me through the rest of the semester.

I think I'm beginning to realize that I can't be super woman.
As much as I want to be and try to be, it's just not gonna happen.
There are days when I may not be as prepared for school as I want.
Days when I just don't know the answer to a question.
Days when I don't feel like leading anyone, because I won't want to get out of bed.
Days when I may be a bit short with people.
Days when I won't want to cook,
or days when my cooking is just plain bad (if you ask my husband about this, I guarantee he will bring up the pad thai incident...).
And finally, there will be days when I just want to sit at home, stay in PJs, watch a chick flick, and have a good cry.
But you know what, that's OKAY.
That's right, it's okay to have days like that.
Not all the time, but ever so often, I think we need these days.
At least I do.
Because then, I start feeling a heck of a lot better about things.
I have my stress out moments and when they're over, things look just a little brighter.

As I'm sitting here writing this, it's sunny and gorgeous outside. And all I want to do is go strolling down the beach. I'm pretty sure it looks like this almost every day here, but for some reason, it seems just a little brighter today.
The wind feels just a bit better than usual.
And when I look at a day like today,
I know that things will be okay.


Ashlin said... Best Blogger Tips

Hang in there!!! You are an amazing person that is for sure. I wish I were as good as blogging as you, but it totally isn't happening. Haha

I hope things get better for you and you enjoy your short break that is coming up!

Rebecca said... Best Blogger Tips

I have days like that too and I also feel a heck of a lot better afterwards!

Thank you for popping over to my blog and following, it means a lot too me :) I'm following too.

P.S That beach looks amazing!

everyone calls me bon bon said... Best Blogger Tips

Nope, no one can be super woman. You have to take time to slow down, enjoy the little things, etc. It's good for the soul, AND for the sanity:-) xoxo

Sophie said... Best Blogger Tips

Ohhh yeh i know those days, and i have nothing on my plate compared to yours! but glad you are feeling better :) and that picture is amazing, i want to be on the beach right now too xx

Rach said... Best Blogger Tips

Thanks for the sweet comment!
beautiful blog...especially any part with pictures of where you live:) I love HI.

Just Another Manic....Tuesday? said... Best Blogger Tips

Thanks for the comment! I am now a new follower :)

I know just how you feel and you are right we are allowed to have a good cry every now and then. Sometimes I feel like I dont have time to have a good cry lol. I think we let outselves get pulled in so many different directions without realizing and then BOOM it hits us how overwhelmed we are. Why oh why do we do this to ourselves?!